i am alternating hands tonight - one wine, one water crocs hang on one bare foot black leggings and an Urban Outfitter sweatshirt that was waaaaay too expensive for the hole that I found in the armpit days later which may or may not have been caused by rough-housing on Sanitas Trail two years ago and which may or may not have lost its duct tape bandage in the wash last month. i still wear it with love and memories. the skull on the back freaks out small children. i pay no mind. skulls are a fact of life.
so is the tip of the tongue, the lips and the teeth and so is the fact that my college acting coach made us say this exact line every day during warm up. it works. i pronounce things better when i say this a few times. i get my m’s working for me. I get my communication on. i will do this on wednesday at 10:30am while sipping coffee and staring at my resume. i will be cool.
but will i be tall? i can’t decide between flats or heels because i’ve got some verticalness on my bones and i like the sky up here and i prefer to see over heads on elevators and in lines but i hate staring down at people and hunching when i shake their hands or before i sit and start to talk about me. and unless you’re tall that is what happens. and it’s good to not intimidate and it’s equally good not to self yourself short, pun intended.
now my drawers are open and a very large banana republic bag sits on my bed with clothes i bought and have yet to try on. i almost got hives when i tried on a blouse in the dressing room and judy, my favorite salesperson of all time ever who’s known me for ten years and i know all about her successful son in new york with the sweet apartment and new puppy i wonder what job he has (probably banking) judy doesn’t believe my severe discomfort in button-downs until I show her the blouse and i feel claustrophobic and i start to sweat. i hate tailored clothes so my life will be lived out in funky clothes. it will be written on the jar that bears my ashes “She Wore Funky Clothes” but I bought the blouse for this one day. first impressions are everything and I have a nickname i need to live up to. i’ll try it on tomorrow, or at Poison’s when my nervous energy decides to show up. always late and right on time.
speaking of time here i am with a nice malbec and i’m thinking i should go to bed or go to argentina make the wine and forget about this interview that has me happy and wondering if kay miller will rock the real world ever/again? the malbec says yes, the water says drink more of me and since i head to the bean tomorrow to eat dinner with my good friend and prep for the magical wednesday meeting, water wins.