It’s storming out. It sounds like a freight train is running circles around my house. Oliver has left the foot of my bed for the safer rug in the hallway should one of the four trees outside my window uproot itself and crash into the side of the house. Smart dog. I stopped writing this blog for a minute because I just got a text from the twin. A quote we share between us glowed on my phone screen, "I carry your heart, I carry it in my heart. xx". Oh, Moo.
I’ve been up since 6AM helping Mary get ready for her journey to Australia. We made eggs. I photocopied a prayer by John Wesley and snuck it into her backpack for her to find later. The coffee was steeping and I was swallowing my eggs along with the very familiar lump in my throat. A sister’s leaving. There would be no crying about this. This is what we do. We spread time out in colorful threads against life’s loom and we weave a beautiful tapestry of everything twin sisters could possibly be to each other and then sew our favorite bits carefully to our forms and we live in them for a while wherever we are. She to Australia for ten weeks, me to Maine and beyond for as long.
I’m convinced that Australia is where fit people go for the winter months. It’s 18 degrees Fahrenheit here in New England, and 77 degrees in Oz. A difficult choice. But aside from the balmy, sunny skies Down Under, Mary Miller will ramp up her hardcore triathlon training to create a solid base for her 2010 season. Sweating a lot, probably non-Miller swearing (which technically is not swearing since in it’s original form, rather, made up words sounding like exclamations found on the back of cereal boxes). And while she covers land and sea by arm-stroke, foot or pedal, I, too will be covering ground on my quest for the Next Great Adventure. And by “Great Adventure” I am referring specifically to a career move that feels right and exciting, takes me out west (maybe?), stretches me professionally, comes complete with a handful of really great humans, is nestled in a cool city with trails and mountains and oceans and good coffee and great vibes. It’s got flavor and passion and potential and my name all over it. It’s out there, right?
Whatever it is, it’s unknown for the moment. But three days before we ring in the New Year I am starting to turn over rocks. This gets me motivated and equally, anxious, scared and timid. But it’s as much a part of the process as those early morning 6k swims or the Sunday 14-milers. They prep you for when it counts. And when it counts, we are challenged to step outside of our comfort zone and hit it. So hit it hard.
I am SO excited about the year’s potential! I see Mary doing her thing and I am so proud of that girl. And then i look in the mirror and I am so proud of this girl. We are SO individual but SO blessed to have each other. To quote my fabulous friend, Annie, “Let me break it down for you on a cellular level...” Two egg, two sperm, two embryos, two baby girls, two best friends, two different paths, two forces of nature, two incredible adventures. Each one cheering in the other’s corner.
The wind is positively going to smash through the windows. I'm convinced my comforter will shield me from the glass if it does. I hit reply on the phone. I let ee cummings finish his beautiful words, "anywhere I go, you go, my dear..."
And so begins two journeys.
we're the girls standing on the porch. I'm about to squish my brother's head between my knobby knees and mary goes rogue vogue (clearly her fashion sense started when we were young, i mean who tucks in shirts when you're a kid?!)